Twilight Dream

Struggling for happiness I trudge forward.
The avoidance of sadness I run toward.
My body wants to feel and embrace Corruption.
As it sways to the music under conduction.

Though I feel bitter stings in my heart.
It won't be mistakes that take me apart.
I'm half the man I was yesteryear.
Three quarters don't subvert my greatest fear.

As the dice reveal that unconditional love is dead.
I sought that water in long dried leaves instead.
As the twenty-sided landed on a one.
We drowned our eyes after it was done.

In my exile, I sought to find sage advice.
To figure out why I was punished but only thrice.
My answers revealed to me a special peace of mind.
A peace where I settled for the Hell in which I dined.

It makes me smile to know that she'll be fine.
As I focus on the greater betterment of mine.
I push and I push as my steps become inert.
As the darkest corruption inside me will subvert.

The darkness cannot take me from the light.
But the darkness will prevent it from impairing my sight.
As we push toward our goals in this coaster ride.
I'll be happy enough to know that inside, I tried.

In between those absolutes I fight with clarity.
As I dabble in old virtues of chivalry and charity.
I've become clear once again in this age.
As I administer my heart a potent triage.

I am not the light and I am not the dark.
I am the gray area in the journey which I embark.
I will not be clouded by the contrast or the bright.
I am the bringer of balance; I am the twilight.